Record-low prices in crude oil and continuing layoffs in the sector have many oil workers concerned about the future of the industry. But it’s not all doom and gloom for oil workers, as some optimistic employees have found a silver lining in the low oil prices. Sloppy rig operators and lazy tanker captains across the world have been celebrating a heyday in low-cost oil spills.
“With oil prices this low, the cost to the company for deep-water oil spills has gone down to practically nothing,” said Adrian Maynard, a rig operator for Exxon. “With this little to lose, I can be as sloppy as a Hometown Buffet dinner guest.”
But rig operators aren’t the only ones happy with the current low price of oil spills. Executives across the industry have been celebrating now for months.
One anonymous executive said, “Ever since the price [of oil] dropped, I haven’t had to care at all about drill malfunctions or oil tanker hull breaches or anything really. I say, spill baby, spill.”
Regardless of where the price of oil is, it seems one thing that will never need to be subsidized in the oil industry is cheery smiles and good moods.
