WOODLAND HILLS, Calif. – Though admitting itemizing “makes good business sense,” local porn star Candi Cummings has become overwhelmed at the number of dildos she’s had to write off this tax year.
“When I gave my accountant my tax folder it was stuffed, just absolutely jam-packed,” Cummings said. “I must have had two, three hundred dildos in there, everything from The Caligula to Chocolate Thunder to Veinenstein.”
While Cummings said in past years she failed to report the relevant dildos, during the 2012 tax season her colleague Summer Swallows changed her mind. Swallows convinced her that keeping track of the dildos could save thousands in her annual tax liability.
“There was certainly an impact,” Cummings said. “In 2014 alone I was able to deduct $350 in King Ghidoras and another $640 in Terrance Phallics. Still, it’s a lot of work.”
At press time, Cummings was making a last-minute correction to the number of Throbmaster 5000s she’d burned through during the course of the year.