Humanity’s greatest fault is its hubris, which is on display every year as baseball stadiums around the country unveil their new food offerings for the upcoming season. Gone are the days of getting a simple hot dog or a bag of peanuts at the game. The simplicities we have been blessed with no longer suffice. We have now entered a horrific cycle of the masses clamoring for more innovation, more exotic tastes, more boundary-pushing – with no thought to the consequences. And now I fear we have reached the moment where we risk retaining any of the qualities that made us human in the first place.
Which brings us to the Dilly Dog, a frightening new creation from the sadistic, tortured souls in the Texas Rangers organization. At a high level, the Dilly Dog is a hollowed-out dill pickle stuffed with a hot dog and then deep fried. On a deeper level, this is such a blatant disregard for the beauty of God’s creations and what he left for us on this planet. There is no doubt He never intended to make such a heinous combination and to do so – while profiting from it – is more than just an affront to God’s will. It will surely be our undoing.
When I usually see something like this, I have to ask myself – how did we get here? What path are we currently on because of it? But I already know these answers when I look at the Dilly Dog, because all I see staring back at me is darkness. Unspeakable darkness for just ten dollars. Much like the dill pickle in this monstrosity, we as a society have been hollowed out, and we’re all trying to stuff it with our own hot dogs, deep frying our lives with misery and depravity.
What path are we on, I ask? The one with its most grim destination.
God has seen the Dilly Dog, and it will be his greatest test of forgiveness in the human race. Are we ready to face the potential outcome?
