Welcome back, you baking nuts! I know it’s been a while since my last post, but with the rolling blackouts, missile alerts and prepping to be my third bestie’s Maid of Honor, girlfriend’s been occu-PIED.
Yes, it’s still in the 100s up here in Seattle (WTF, Mother Nature? Mama’s annual ski trip’s coming up!), but if you think that’s keeping me from rockin’ my shearling-lined booties and fave flannel shirt, you are sorely mistaken. I just crank up the AC and pretend the ash outside from the nearby forest fire’s a fresh blanket of snow. Call me a cock-eyed optimist, just don’t call me late for dinner, amiright?!
But seriously, I think we’re all feeling a little tense right now what with the recent government collapse, the four category-six hurricanes hitting both coasts simultaneously, and the Beyonce-Jay Z split. Life can be truly unfair sometimes.
So I thought, what better time to introduce my new, improved and totally-out-of-this-world paleo brownie recipe?
For real, y’all, these brownies will change your life. When you’ve run out of your anti-depressants and the pharmacy’s only open every other day now so you’re just hiding under a blanket in your bomb shelter scrolling through old Instagram photos because just seeing the words “Breaking News” sends you straight into a panic attack, these babies will make you right as rain again. I’m no doctor, I can’t explain the science behind it. All I can say is, when these ingredients come together, magic happens.
The best part about these brownies is how easy they are to make. JK, it’s ’cause they taste so g-darn good! As long as you have 25 minutes, almond flour and a residual faith in humanity, these are right in your wheelhouse.
A few tricks to make these b’s uber special:
DON’T overmix. If you overmix, your brownies will come out dry, which means they will barely distract you from the countless major catastrophes happening daily. Try to mix until the ingredients are just combined.
DO swap the sugar. I use coconut sugar in my brownies because they have a lower glycemic index. That said, if you’d rather use regular old cane sugar, go for it! All the oceans will rise no matter what we do, so who really cares, right?
DON’T overbake. My girlfriends and I looove a fudgy center (who doesn’t?) so I always pull these out on the early side. Plus, less oven time means you’re helping to save the environment by keeping the house cooler, so it’s a win-win.
DO share with the people you love. Whether you’re celebrating the start of the weekend, or a whole week free of mass shootings, these brownies will be the moist, chocolatey cherry on top.
In times like these, when everything is terrifying and it feels like nothing matters anymore, it’s the little things that remind us what’s really important – legal addictive substances.
