KENOSHA, Wisc. – With so much on the line in her swing state home of Wisconsin, local stripper Chastity Monroe has been expertly working the poll this Election Day.
“I’m just glad to be doing this for all of them,” Monroe said, as she bounced up and down the long line of people waiting to vote. “There’s nothing more fulfilling than taking care of these eager voters.”
Monroe jumped at the chance to volunteer for this historic election, and both voters and fellow poll workers alike noted Tuesday that Monroe carries herself like someone who has worked the poll for plenty of years.
“Oh yeah, she’s got me really excited [to vote],” noted local carpenter and infamous town pervert Jeremy Davies.
Whether she’s registering new voters, answering ballot questions, or simply doing anything she can to ensure a safe and smooth election process, Monroe has earned the respect of her fellow poll workers.
“I’ve never seen someone work a poll as hard as her,” said 87-year-old Ethel Marris. “I hope I’m not being too blunt, but it’s hot as hell.”
