“He who smelt it, dealt it.” – Anonymous
“He who made the rhyme, did the crime.” – Anonymous (but a different one)
There is no greater guarantee that one is the purveyor of gas than going on about said gas.
In fact, I am always suspicious that one must have been the flatulator.
The only difference between the farter and the smeller is that every farter has a bottom, and every smeller has a nose.
Men always like to be the first who dealt it; women always like to be the last who smelt it.
There are only two tragedies in life: smelling a fart and farting what you smell.
The only thing better than smelling a fart, is not smelling a fart.
One always goes on about smelling a fart just as much as one farts.
All women say they smell farts. That is their tragedy. All men are the culprits of the farts. That is theirs.
Always say you smell a fart; there is no better way to announce your guilt.
The only difference between farting and not farting is how much one talks about it.
It’s not whether you farted or not that is important. It is that people believed you farted.
Life is far too important to never announce one’s farts.
If you have not smelled anything, then you have not farted.
Some cause flatulence wherever they go; others whenever they go (to the bathroom).
Smell your own fart. Everyone else’s farts are already taken.
I can resist everything except temptation to fart.
I have nothing to declare, except I farted.
