Selections of Lyrics From Popular Songs as Imagined After the Seafood Buffet
Tell me why
Ain’t nothing but a gut-ache
Tell me why
This buffet was a mistake
Tell me why
I never want to hear you say
I ate it that way
Left the clams out, now they’re dangerous
Here we are now, please hydrate us
I feel nauseous, not contagious
Here we are now, please hydrate us
Oh, I just died in your arms tonight
It must have been something I ate
I just died in your arms tonight
Oh, I just died in your arms tonight
It must have been not so fresh fish
I should have walked away
“All you can eat” they say
Hey, I just ate shrimp,
And this is crazy,
It tasted spoiled
I’ll throw up, maybe
We couldn’t eat it all
Creatures from the deep
Caught my vomit in my hands
Cause the squid, it was cheap
It started out with a fish, how did it end up like this
It was only a fish
It was only a fish
And now I can’t really sleep
I just threw up in a cab
I think the fish it was old
And now it’s getting quite bad
My crabcake brings all the boys to the yard
And they’re like, it’s spoiled and hard
Damn right, it’s spoiled and hard
That’ll teach me, I used so much sauce
‘Cause I knew it was trouble when I walked in
So shame on me now
Went to a buffet I’d never been
And really went to town, oh
I knew it was trouble when I walked in
So shame on me now
Gorged on a buffet I’d never been
Now I’m lying on the cold hard ground
Oh, oh, buffet, buffet, buffet
Oh, oh, buffet, buffet, buffet
I would do anything for love
Any diner you’d been dreaming of
But I just can’t eat that
Cause I’ll never stop thinking of the night I threw up all of that fish
Oh, I would do anything for love
Oh, I would do anything for love
I would do anything for love
but I won’t eat that
Yesterday
Stomach troubles seemed so far away
Now it looks as though they’re here to stay
Wish I had pizza yesterday