The Dark Elves who designed The East Lake Golf Club in Atlanta have added some new twists for the upcoming Tour Championship.
For those who don’t know, East Lake is one of the oldest golf clubs in America, created by a race of Dark Elves who dwelled below the earth’s surface back in the before-times — before the great war between the dwarfs, orcs, goblins, and elves. This bloody, devastating war wiped out the entire kingdom of Dragonsbane, which was the place we now call Atlanta in this realm.
Everything was obliterated, except for this course, the Dragonsbane Bowlfing and Social Club, where the wealthiest of Elves and Goblins engaged in leisure activities, keeping out the less socially acceptable Dwarfs and Orcs. The 6,400 smoots course was a par 1,800, but keep in mind that the game was different than the one we now play. When it was the Dragonsbane club, they used large round heavy balls, similar to what we call bowling balls today, and they hit these large balls with heavy sticks, or shillelaghs, as they called them. Each shot would only go a few feet, so a typical par on a 400-smoot hole was around 100.
When that realm was destroyed in the Great War and this current realm emerged, the only survivors were the Dark Elves, as they lived underground and managed to escape the fiery apocalyptic end of the world they knew as Dragonsbane. Eventually, the Dark Elves emerged from their underground home to find a new realm in its place, the one we currently live in.
The Dragonsbane course somehow survived the carnage, and now a race of humans inhabited the realm, milling about the former course in this place known as Atlanta. But the Dark Elves claimed ownership of the grounds, as it was theirs before the end-times. They also claimed what is now the underground parking garage at the Georgia World Congress Center.
The Dark Elves were initially shunned by the humans, but eventually, they warmed up to one another, thanks mostly to the course. The humans were curious about the game played on the grounds and the Dark Elves introduced them to the sport, which they now called golf. The Dark Elves realized that they had to shrink the size of the ball and make the shillelaghs, now clubs, a little sturdier, to accommodate the weaker human race. Their instincts were indeed correct as the sport took off as this new game of golf proved to be far more enjoyable — and much faster — than bowlfing.
As for the Dragonsbane Club, it was now known simply known as East Lake Golf Club. It became the center of the fledgling sport in this new realm and soon became the home course of the great human golfer, Bobby Jones. It has also hosted many of the great championship tournaments of the age, including the Tour Championship. And, as they have in the past, the Dark Elves will have some surprises in store for this year’s Tour Championship, which runs August 25 through August 28.
“We have a few tricks up our proverbial sleeves,” said course director and head groundskeeper Nelaeryn Molostroi, who is also Rear Flank Commander in the Dark Elven Army. He wouldn’t give anything away but offered a few cryptic teasers to reporters. “Let’s just say, there will be fire, dragons, random portals, and a wizard” – the same wizard, Ulrandir, who cast the key spell on Jon Rahm that led to Patrick Cantlay’s 1-shot win at last year’s Tour Championship.
Should be fun!
