I only agreed to go to the audition so that I could get out of hearing another Berenstain Bears story at circle time in school. But when it went well, I started to like the idea. Making a movie sounded fun. And who doesn’t want to ride a tricycle inside?
As far as I can tell I play a kid who talks to his finger and can’t ride a two-wheeler yet, and he’s on a vacation with his parents in the winter. That’s all I know. I ride around, and the Director says “Action!” and “Cut!” and we play pretending games. Like, Pretend someone is chasing you. Or, Pretend there’s blood pouring out of that elevator. It’s fun.
I’ve made a few commercials before, and I was on a TV episode. Movies are different because they take longer. And also everyone is always asking you if you’re ok. The other actors, the lighting guy, the makeup lady. I was getting a cookie at the craft services table the other day and the lady there asked me if I needed to talk about it. Who needs to talk about cookies? Movies are weird.
I like the filming part. The Director will face the camera at me and say things like, “Can you make a happy face? Good, good. How about … scared? How about, more scared? How about, really, really scared? That’s great! Hey, do you know what a seizure is?”
I’m not the only kid in this movie. There are two girls, too, but my mother won’t let me play with them because they “give her the creeps.” So when I’m not filming it’s mostly me and my mom in the green room and I play Hot Wheels or watch cartoons or whatever. Sometimes one of the grownups in the movie comes to join us. I’ve tried getting them to play UNO with me, but they usually just sit very still in a chair and stare a million miles away. Sometimes one of them will hug me tight for way too long, and my mom or I will have to say something.
We just filmed a scene where my character plays with his dad in the snow. The dad and I threw a few snowballs and then the Director called to me, “Hey, try running away from him. Faster! NO, DON’T LOOK BACK!”
Right now they’re shooting a scene in a bathroom. I’m not in it, but I saw part of it while I was getting some Froot Loops from craft services. I don’t know what was going on, but I know what an ax is. I mean, I’m five, but I’m not stupid.
It’s possible this isn’t a movie about a kid who’s really good at riding a tricycle.