PORTLAND—Patrons of last Friday’s comedy open mic at Milton’s Taproom received a surprise when one performer uttered a sentence that informed and punctuated the sentence preceding it, reports now indicate.
During his locally famous “Top Five Comebacks For When a Basilisk Mocks You Because You Had Taco Bell Twice in One Day” routine, comedian Auden Park was rounding out the third comeback—(“Tell me, basilisk, does calling me fat ease the hurt inside?”)—when he started to adlib: “Maybe next time I should just have a sandwich. I make good peanut butter sandwiches.”
Then he paused and added, “My peanut butter sandwiches are jam-packed.”
The remark was met with a smattering of giggles, and at least two fellow comedians looked up from their notepads and clapped. “It may have been more like three other comedians,” said an audience member in the aftermath.
Now, the Portland comedy scene has been left to piece together the implications of that night’s events.
“It’s just that we’ve never had someone use their stage time in that manner before,” said Hattie Foster, a postcolonialist mime and producer for Milton’s weekly show.
“Open mic rooms usually have guidelines about certain things,” explained Rachel Dunbar, an area ventriloquist whose primary focus is deconstructionism. “There’s rules against hate speech and harassment and stuff, but for something like this, no one really knows how to proceed.”
“Most people just get up and tell a story that goes nowhere, but like ironically,” Foster agreed.
In the days since the open mic at Milton’s, performers in the city have yet to follow Park’s lead, sticking instead to more traditional, directionless fare. “We pride ourselves on creating a safe environment for our community,” said one booker. “This whole thing might blow over, frankly.”
Park was previously named Best Comedian of 2021 by Laddy’s Laughs and Lanes, due largely to his routine about why he prefers to pee sitting down during leap years.
