Here are our picks for the major category winners of the 2025 Academy Awards. We expect them to all be confirmed during tonight’s Oscars telecast!
Actor in a Supporting Role
Jimmy Kimmel for his performance hosting the 2024 Academy Awards.
Actress in a Supporting Role
My aunt Denise, who sincerely told my dad to “shut up” during a heated game of Scategories during my family’s beach vacation.
Actor in a Lead Role
Wyatt Russell for the scene in Night Swim where, after he becomes possessed and his family begins to fall apart literally and metaphorically, he goes in his garage, sets a mid-2000s camcorder on a tripod, and films an audition tape for the Milwaukee Brewers.
Actress in a Lead Role
Raygun.
Best Editing
Considering I went completely MIA for like three months last year, this one goes to Emily Kapp from The Belladonna.
Best Adapted Screenplay
My friend Joe explaining the entire narrative of Dune to me unprompted during a long car ride.
Best Original Screenplay
The trailer for the movie Challengers that made us think it wasn’t mostly about tennis.
Best Director
The Foul Beast of Albathor, who greeted me in the middle of the night at a foggy fork in the road, offering two paths before me. One which would lead to riches beyond my earthly imagination, and one which would take me to a desolate wasteland of brand synergy and artistic selling out. I weighed my choice heavily as I ate the new Batter-Dipped Chicken Tenders from Captain D’s. Captain D’s, why stop at fish?
Best Picture
This one, because after I put it on my Instagram a person I hadn’t talked to in 4 years messaged me and asked me what my job is.
