CHICAGO – An area man realized this morning that he never actually wrote down those resolutions he was planning to write, even though he he talked about doing it for months. Witness (his roommate) on the scene said that when he made the realization, he said.
“Oh well, I’ll do them today. It’s only the 12th.”
Some of the other late resolutions included:
Stop Procrastinating
Buy a calendar. Preferably a funny one. Like one of those Far Side ones where you get to see a whole comic strip and then just tear the whole page off. I guess it’s possible you get a really funny one though… then you wouldn’t want to tear it off and throw it away and it’s not like you’re gonna tear it off then keep it. I guess you could just leave it on the funny one until you’re tired of it, then pull a ton really quick to catch up later.
Buy a wall calendar with noting interesting on it.
Say “yes” more
Finally finish that book I haven’t started
Mail these to Kyle and tell him that if I haven’t done them all by 2026, he can have my PS5. I’ll get it notarized so it’s binding. I know he really wants it.
Go to the gym once (just to see if I like it)
