On the eve of the new year the undersigned hereby, Reiterates support for flossing once a day Acknowledges the value of heart-healthy food swaps (e.g., nutpods for creamer), artist dates, and setting boundaries with telemarketers Reaffirms the need to learn more effective time management skills Wonders if subdividing tasks into 25-minute increments using an egg timer works as well as people say it does Imagines that a less cluttered apartment would boost productivity, not to mention mood Points out that it’s mostly Paul’s stuff anyway Wonders if the real problem is an unwillingness to let go of the past Recalls…