Mr. President, you’ve made an awesome start toward bringing back coal mining jobs and making America great again. But what about the chimney sweeps? These unsung heroes of carbon-based employment have been over-regulated and maligned for more than a century, unable to practice their craft with the dignity their soot-covered bodies and stunted frames deserve. What gives Big Government the right to tell hard-working children that squeezing their way up narrow creosote-encrusted chutes, scraping bodies to the bone while risking suffocation in the hot flues, is too dangerous and unhealthy? Sure, many of them develop horrific diseases by puberty, but isn’t there more to life than…
Author: Boris Polonoff
Boris Polonoff
Boris Polonoff is a quality assurance consultant, writer, and intermittent YouTube auteur, living on Manhattan's UIpper West Side close to Zabar's. His satirical videos can be viewed at https://www.youtube.com/c/BigBadBoris and his quality assurance work helps your software run more smoothly.