Happy second COVID Halloween! This holiday only comes once a pandemic year, so make it count. Good work ordering your children’s costumes early because of supply chain breaks. Now the question for last year’s fortune-teller-costumed parent is, “Will the post office continue to deliver mail?” You didn’t order the costume early? Well, maybe your child can sprint down the sidewalk yelling, “Zoom!” and circle back to ask you for snacks every five minutes. You can always answer, “You’re on mute!” I’m sorry you won’t be invited into the school for the classroom parties. Maybe you can peek in through an…
Author: Chloe Yelena Miller
Chloe Yelena Miller
Chloe Yelena Miller is a writer based in Washington, D.C. She teaches writing at the University of Maryland Global Campus and Politics & Prose Bookstore in Washington, D.C., as well as privately. She blogs at chloeyelenamiller.com and tweets at @ChloeYMiller.
Want to celebrate being Italian-American without the inaccurate history of a man who didn’t identify as Italian, worked for a Spaniard, captained a boat to what isn’t the United States and murdered indigenous people? This year, don’t argue about a parade or stare at an oxidized, headless statue of the guy on a horse covered in graffiti. Instead, drink a Hyper-Grande Starbucks latte that inexplicably includes coffee and: 1. Boil spaghetti in water; throw a few strands on the ceiling. Do they stick? If the answer is “yes,” get your broom ready to knock them into your plate. Add some…