Author: Chris Aileo

Dear Students of Our Beloved Community, As we rapidly approach this fall semester, uncertainty still lingers. We understand that many of you are questioning the safety of an education during a zombie outbreak, and to that incredibly burning issue, we would just like to say this: we hear you. Feel better already, don’t you? From the beginning, our university has valued the safety of our students. You have to give us some credit; we did send you home in the spring when there were only a few zombies. We feel that although the apocalypse is as bad as it’s ever been,…

1. Willy Wonka and the Lithium Ion Battery – Roald Dahl While the well-known classic Charlie and the Chocolate Factory takes us on a journey through Wonka’s mysterious world, the original story details Willy Wonka’s monopolization of the rechargeable battery industry. In this rough draft, Chinese preteens, rather than the beloved Oompa Loompas, help run the factory. 2. The Life of Rye – Yann Martel It is little-known that the author of The Life of Pi, Yann Martel, was a huge fan of the reuben sandwich. In his original draft of the novel, a young boy becomes lost at sea…

Do you find yourself struggling to find an answer to this question: Should I have mud all over my body right now? If you have, you are not alone, for this is no easy question to answer. That’s why we, the National Association of Mud and Dirt, have created a simple yet effective list of pros and cons to guide your decision: Pros It might look like you just came from playing sports, which is awesome. Those guys who throw mud at you every day will be miserable when they realize their mud only adds to the existing mud, rendering…