Look, I know that we’ve had some bad times together. Sure, I’ve done things that I’m not proud of. But that $14 2-pack of Venus razors is not the answer to your pain. Forget about those deeply engraved scars on your leg. That was many moons ago, and you know that what we have together is thrilling. You never know what’ll happen. You’re next in line at the 123 Discount Store and I can tell that you just can’t stop yourself from eying me. Stop looking at the 25% off carpet cleaner! I’m right here, sweetie—nestled between the fuzzy keychains…
Author: Erin McLaughlin
Erin McLaughlin
Erin McLaughlin is a satire writer, stand-up comedian, and author of the debut comedic fiction novel, The Lobster Heist. Her work has been featured in The Hard Times, Points in Case, Hard Drive, and Screen Queens, and she has also edited comedy specials streaming on HBO. She is the co-founder and former Head Editor of the satirical crowdfunding website, JumpKick, which was ranked as one of the 50 Best Comedy Websites of 2020 and featured in The Washington Post. Erin holds a B.A. in English-Creative Writing from Binghamton University, and an M.A. in Communication from Baruch College.