This recent tragedy? Sad, atrocious, not to mention tragic. Which is why we should be focusing on what’s most important right now: my new small business of artisanal wares. You see, this past spring I got on a real creative tear: pressing ink stamps of ladybugs onto T-shirts and fabricating earrings from found objects in my neighbor’s trash. I became divinely inspired to repurpose corks from wine bottles and even learned calligraphy. For countless hours I pressed and painted, hand-dipped and handcrafted until the inventory in my living room matched the mood board hanging above my bed. There I was,…
Author: Hunter Gardner
Hunter Gardner
Hunter Gardner is a nice guy who is just happy to be here, specifically Brooklyn, but really anywhere that is not his apartment is fine. His writing has also appeared in McSweeney's, Points In Case, and the British publication Pop To!. Follow him on Twitter @HunnaGardnah.
Do I have a minute to fight climate today? Fine, I’ll take out one of my AirPods. But you should know that I’m not going to donate any money because I’ve already done my part this week by reading five headlines about it. Did I actually read any of the articles? Trust me, I was absolutely outraged when I read the headlines so I didn’t even need to. You should have been there when I spotted “17 of the 18 Warmest Years on Record Have Occurred Since 2000.” I rolled my eyes and emailed it to myself to read later.…
I have hit the vintage clothing store jackpot: the perfect jacket, I’m sure of it. Do I have other jackets? Of course. But I have changed and grown as a person since last fall, and this jacket really drives that point home. This jacket will tell the world that a new jacket means a new me, even though it is, in fact, an old jacket. In this jacket I will be my true self. Yes, this jacket is going to change everything. That said, the price of this jacket equates to almost half my rent – which is also wildly outside…
I’ve been praying a lot lately, and I just have to tell you something: God has really put it on my heart to ask you out for coffee this weekend, and then to marry me in six months. I know we’re friends – “just friends” to use your exact words – but I think you’ll agree that now is the time to move this relationship from the church lobby to a Christian-owned coffee shop. And then, six months from now, to a moderately difficult hiking trail where I will ask you to marry me. I’m sure you remember the first…