Author: Laurie Hartung

There once was a man from St. Paul. He was invited to join a bar crawl. While his friends all puked green, He was not to be seen; He stayed home bingeing Better Call Saul. My kids wanted to see the parade. I took them downtown, unafraid. But this crowd stirs my cortisol; I’d like to kill you all. Prison would be an upgrade. In Chicago, the river’s dyed green. Though the EPA should intervene— From what I can tell By the look and the smell: That’s how it always has been. Waking up super early for…