Due to rising temperatures, combined with humanity finally coming to an end in a dark, festering pit of despair, the CDC recommends keeping all family members in separate rooms for the full duration of the summer. Exposure to social media, television, or traditional print media should be expressly avoided during this time, as doing so may result in agitation over one or more following: Guns Not enough guns Gorillas Not enough gorillas Swimmers Rapists Swimming rapists The Constitution (and related memes) Women People who aren’t women but know exactly what women should do Bathrooms (and the genitalia that inhabit them)…
Author: Sara Given
Sara Given
Sara Given is the creator of the popular Tumblr blog, It's Like They Know Us and author of the book, 'Parenting is Easy: You’re Probably Just Doing It Wrong.' Growing up, she was often told, "No one is ever going to pay you to goof around."