Warm weather is here and Mike Pence is churning up summer’s favorite political ice cream flavors! Be sure to scoop up some of the vice president’s thirty-one flavors, including: 1) Not Without My Wife Coffee Liqueur Cookies-and-Cream 2) Rust Belt Conservative Cherry Chocolate Chip 3) Sexual Reparative Therapy Rainbow Sherbet 4) Abstinence-Only Almond Crunch 5) Prayer in School Bananas & Nuts 6) Opposition to Women’s Healthcare Macadamia Nut Cream 7) Old-Fashioned Vanilla 8) Misogynistic Mint Chip 9) Repeal & Replace Blueberry Ripple 10) “Drain the Swamp” Strawberry Cheesecake 11) Religious Freedom Bill Butter Pecan 12) Social Conservative Salted Caramel 13) Climate Science Denier White Chocolate Chunk 14) NRA Grade-A Peanut Butter Fudge…
Author: Stacey Zapalac
Stacey Zapalac
Stacey Zapalac (@smzapalac) is a Chicago-based humor writer who has studied improv, writing, and satire at The Second City Training Center. She enjoys consuming trans fats, watching the Chicago Cubs, and yes, Zapalac is her real last name. To see more of her work visit staceyzapalac.net.