I’ve never truly understood the appeal of lawn ornaments. Outside of holidays like Halloween and Christmas, the best lawns to me have always relied on cultivating nature as opposed to sticking gnomes and flamingos and racism haphazardly across the yard. But hey, it’s a free country. People can do what they want with their property. On the whole it doesn’t affect my life at all. Except for the fucking fake deer. See, I live in Northeast Ohio. We have plenty of real deer around, and they have a tendency to run out into the street when you are driving. If…
Author: Tim Gaydos
Tim Gaydos
Tim is a contributor for Robot Butt and is not hosting a parasitic xenomorph inside him, so just don't worry about it, ok? You can disagree with his opinions on Twitter @timthinksthings.
If you have been watching the news at all lately, you have probably realized that the United States and Russia are back to hating each other without coming out and saying that they hate each other. You know, like 13-year-old girls. And while tensions between the two have been reaching critical mass, it looks like the final straw my have been reached: Russia is going after McDonald’s. Yes, one of the most visible poster corporations for capitalism is about to get sent to the gulags. It’s absolutely symbolic, but it also makes some sense. At the end of the Cold…
Regardless of where you stand on the spectrum of “Best Thing Ever!” and “Socialism, Kill It With Fire!”, the Affordable Care Act (or Obamacare) has pretty much succeeded in terms of its goal to dramatically increase the number of insured in the country. Hooray! Everyone has insurance and life is wonderful! Here’s the thing, though. For many of the newly insured, this is now the first time they have had medical insurance. Or maybe you’re a young adult who is off your parents’ plan and fending for yourself for the first time. If you’ve never dealt with it before, it…
Guess what everyone, true love is real! Just look at Joran Van der Sloot, who just got married this past Friday. If you’re wondering why his name looks familiar, it’s because Van der Sloot is suspected of murdering Natalee Holloway, and is serving a 28-year prison sentence for the murder of another woman. Meanwhile, those of us still single will probably die alone. Depending on your outlook, this is either great news or really depressing. On the one hand, if a high-profile murderer with a name straight out of the “Naming Bond Villians” guide can find someone who loves him,…
Good news, guys. Facebook is going to start using your browsing history to target ads to you. Fantastic, right? Finally, advertisements for Buzzfeed’s My Little Pony PornHub will be delivered straight to you! We truly live in amazing times. Fortunately, Facebook has made it possible to opt out of this service. And just like every other time they change the privacy policies, it’s super easy to figure out how to control your own information. Might as well call it Intuitivebook. Here is a step-by-step tutorial on how to prevent Facebook from using your iPhone’s* browsing history for advertising: Go To…