Life is so stressful! Everyone’s facing more challenges at work, more worries about their relationships, and more fear that democracy as we know it is crumbling. It’s enough to leave anyone frazzled! But don’t worry – here are some self-care tips to help ease your mind while the country falls deeper and deeper into a shit spiral. Meditate Worried about the Trump presidency taking a big ol’ dump on America’s system of checks and balances? When unbridled panic starts creeping up your throat, try meditation! Sit cross-legged on a pillow, take a deep breath, and cry uncontrollably. If you need…
Author: Vanessa Armstrong
Vanessa Armstrong
Vanessa Armstrong is a writer in Los Angeles who has a complicated relationship with squirrels. You can find her on Twitter as @vfarmstrong.
Hey you. Yeah you, you stupid fuck. You see any other mouth-breathing moron staring at his phone instead of the goddamned sidewalk? News flash for you, bro: you’re a fucking asshole. Only a complete asshole or a complete fucking idiot would step on my nuts with shit-laden hipster trash moccasins. That’s right, those are MY acorns, and I’m gonna scoop them up in my mouth because I’m a motherfucking squirrel and that’s how I roll. Dude. I’m only gonna tell you one more time: Get. Off. My. Nuts. That’s right. Walk away, you fucking fedora-wearer. If I see you back…