Remarks Expected during Revelries Wound Tighter than a Pre-Roll “Damned, This Year’s Easter Parade Took Long to Complete.” “Let’s Call…
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We enter a television station in upstate New York. Reporter Christine Fabares takes center stage. Cameras buzz around her as…
Robot Butt and Mr. Sandwich’s Space Time Deli Meat Giveaway! Tonight at 7:30 at The Bughouse Theater in Chicago, IL,…
We’ve worked with Microsoft to rename their most popular fonts to better reflect how they are most commonly used in…
WASHINGTON – Local film major and most annoying guy to meet at a social event Clyde Wilson has reported that…
TALLAHASSEE – A local turtle that has chosen to remain anonymous was completely emasculated this morning when it was picked…
My name is Gordo Munch. You probably know me as one of the big guys that stands near the door…
MORE GRIM TODAY THAN DIRE GERMANIC ORIGINALS TRUMPLESTILSKIN: Desperate to win favor, a sycophant convinces the King that his daughter…
Turns out I was just drafting a press release with better punctuation. A few days ago, I sat down to…
Congratulations, citizens of America! You’ve just unboxed the all-new Democracy Lite™, the nation’s most streamlined, ahistorical, user-friendly approach to civic…