MONTGOMERY, Ala. – Following the stunning upset by Democrat Doug Jones in last night’s special Senate election, Alabamians announced to the…
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WASHINGTON – After announcing his resignation yesterday, Minnesota Senator Al Franken has reportedly purchased a home in Greenville, Alabama. “I like…
DES MOINES, Iowa – Three months after being relegated to the freezer because it wasn’t consumed fast enough, a now rock-hard…
LONDON – The wait is over! Famed chocolatier and Warden of the 9th Interdimensional Rift Willy Wonka has at last selected…
BOSTON – Yesterday, Mark Evans woke up from a coma more than seventeen years after a horrific car crash that almost…
HEAVEN – Citing significant safety concerns, about 3.4 billion human males were recalled last week by Heaven’s Department of Product Safety.…
CEDAR FALLS, Iowa – Hoping to get a jumpstart on the holiday shopping season, Gerald Colsen has already begun camping in…
Another Thanksgiving has come and gone, and now that the last bite of green bean casserole has been choked down…
Mouths agape and eyes fixed on their clasped hands, Americans at dining tables across the country today struggled to name…
WASHINGTON – In an impromptu White House press conference this morning, President Trump, clad in a tight-fitting turkey costume, pardoned…